How to love yourself

This time of year is all about love 💗

There are many kinds of love, and they’re all important and beautiful in their own way. But today, we wanted to focus on self-love. Because ultimately, when we love and accept ourselves, it is much easier to love and allow ourselves to be loved by others.

The relationships we have with ourselves are often the most complex. So many of us direct our hurts, anger and insecurities inwards, and become our own harshest critics.

The route to self-love is frequently one of unlearning: of disentangling ourselves from internalised societal messages and letting go of unkind words we heard in childhood. For this reason, learning to accept ourselves unconditionally takes work. But it's so worth it. 

Want to improve your relationship with yourself? Here's how to get started. 

Self-awareness

What is it?

Understanding yourself. Tuning into your emotions and bodily sensations, knowing what you need and how best to meet those needs. 

How can you work on it? 

• Regularly checking in with yourself throughout the day.  
• Practicing meditation and mindfulness. 
• Journalling.
• Going to therapy. 

Self-belief

What is it?

Confidence in your own beliefs and abilities, independent from external validation. 

How can you work on it? 

• Repeat positive affirmations.
• Identify negative self-talk and try to reframe thoughts more positively. 
• Journalling.
• Going to therapy. 

Want to watch the whole thing? You can find Isik's full class (and many, many more!) on the MindLabs app.

Self-acceptance

What is it?

Embracing who you are, rather than trying to mould yourself into the person you think others want you to be. 

How can you work on it? 

• Practice gratitude (e.g. for your body: rather than focusing on what your body looks yourself, think about all the things it allows you to do). 
• Practice 'radical acceptance' of the things you cannot change. 
• Spend time with people who uplift and inspire you, and accept you unconditionally.

Self-compassion

What is it?

Treating yourself with the same kindness and compassion you offer to others, and forgiving yourself for your mistakes. 

How can you work on it? 

• Ask yourself: would I speak this way to someone I love?
• Practice mindfulness. 

Self-care

What is it?

Showing yourself, with intentional acts, that you're worthy of care and attention. Self-care is an investment in you. 

How can you work on it? 

• Prioritise rest.
• Create your self-care toolkit: a list of activities, rituals or objects that calm you and help you feel whole. 
• Take ten minutes each day to do something that brings you joy.